Acceptance vs. Control

“Accept one another…” Rom 15:7

I recently asked myself, “What is the opposite of control?” My answer – Acceptance.
The word Accept, means “to accommodate or reconcile yourself to.” If I am focused on accepting someone, there leaves little room for controlling. One way to love others is by accepting them. According to Mautrana, love is to “Open up for him room for existence beside us” (from Tree of Knowledge). When we make a place for someone next to us, we accept him.

What if instead of saying “I love you” I said, “I accept you.” This can make us control freaks cringe. Some of us have a list of things we don’t accept about our family members or friends. Wouldn’t it be better if they changed? We feel safer having things our way. But it’s a false sense of security and puts our own wants, wishes and desires, above others. We’re saying what I want is more important than what you want, which is the antithesis of love.

I’ve been practicing acceptance lately and it’s not easy. My family members, on the other hand, seem happier. I’m learning that I can be content even when people aren’t changing the way I think they should. Maybe if I let others be the gift that they are, let them struggle, give them grace, we will all find more peace.